Sometimes the world around us offers more than we can take in. Our minds get overloaded so we shut off some of our sensors. We become preoccupied with our to-do lists, mental replaying of conversations, planning our multi-taking steps.
All of this means we no longer perceive what is right in front of us. We become cut off from the world and from ourselves. We can’t see the rose, much less stop to smell it.When we try to talk to others, they can’t hear us because they have the same personal interference we do. They can’t listen.
We are rapidly becoming perceptually bereft and need to learn again how to notice…life.
To connect to ourselves, each other and the Spirit, sometimes we need someone to take time, to pay attention, to listen…to really listen. We don’t need someone to solve our problems or issues, but to understand, even to feel, our situation with us. And to support us. We need someone who cares about us, who affirms us, who takes us as we are, and who will be with us.
With this listening resource, we can hope to loosen the tight structures of our lives and realize that perhaps there are gaps where something different, something unexpected could happen. We can play with thoughts and ideas as we have not been able to before. We can even begin to listen to ourselves.
We aren’t sick, but we are human and sometimes we need someone to be with us as we talk through what’s on our mind. Through the process of Intensive Listening, by both speaker and listener, awareness of unformulated ideas or thoughts held too rigidly come to the fore.
The Speaker, the Listener and the Focus form a Triangle of Attention during an exchange. The Focus is whatever the Speaker wants to talk about; it may be a past experience, a relationship, a feeling, a situation. The Speaker draws the attention of the Listener to the Focus so that both try to see, to hear the same things. The Listener asks questions to clarify, so that the Focus becomes clearer. By objectifying the Focus and describing it to another, the Speaker can begin to understand it better.